Bone or Flesh?
Baggage, according to the English dictionary, is a factor that restrict a person’s freedom, often in an intellectual or psychological way. Emotional baggage had successfully destroyed many relationships. Note that it is important we identity these ‘baggages’ before entering into relationships and deal with them if you must experience a successful relationship. For instance, a man or woman has to enter into a new and different relationship because their previous partner cheated on them or was presumed to have cheated on them, promised to marry or get married to them and because of this negative experience, having given them the whole of their life, they might be willing or negative to start any other relationship because their assumption will be that human are the same.
Do not carry the emotional baggage of your previous relationship into the subsequent ones, it can successfully hinder its growth and/or success. Note that if they are needed in your life God would have allowed them to settle down with you. Note that human are custom-made, stop juxtaposing. What makes your earlier partner to be accepted in his own world is their unique features and might not be relevant in this new person’s world. Note that every error committed by your current partner will always become questionable and a point if reference to your earlier partner’s deeds because you long them to portray some basic qualities that resemble theirs and this will only and always land you on a serious argument and disagreement with your current partner.
Learn the differences in human because they are custom-made and adjust yourself in like manner rather than making a continuous negative assertions and conclusions.
Note that you can’t cease from running into several erroneous conclusion about your subsequent relationship if you are yet to unleash the offences and pains of your earlier relationship. Be healed of your wounds if you must experience a successful subsequent relationship. Let your past be behind you and never gradually and stylishly eat into your present and future.
Note that the words of those that still live in the past while in the future is usually being flooded with a conditional statement ‘had it been.’ Some will say had it been I did not lose my parents, I would have been more successful than this. Bear in mind that their non-existence is not a justifiable reason for you not being successful. Their non-existence had only come to teach you how to make some critical decisions about your life without the consent of your parents and be responsible for the consequences of your actions. Some too will say that had it been that I did not part ways with bro so..so.. Or sis so…so.., you won’t be treating me like this.
Stop holding unto your earlier mistake while you keep nailing yourself to the cross via emotional expression (emotionally jejune) but rather concentrate on how to make your current relationship the best place to be and not a mini hell fire on earth. Note that individual person is a custom-made and there are no two versions of them. If you’re pressing hard to see those observable features that gladden your heart in your earlier relationship that failed in your subsequent ones, you will consistently run into an immense conflict. Note that to understand each other will become problematic because the kind of the world and the means of survival you’re building around them is nothing but an antagonist to their real identity- for you to have a successful with such a person, you need to first understand their real identity.
Many people are never better of in relationship because they keep comparing their past with their future. They professed to have moved past their past and never being ruled by the thoughts of it again but their words are never void of the things of their past. For instance, a lady used to be with a man called Kunle and whenever Kunle buys her something new, he will make it a surprise to her and after presenting the gift to the damsel, he will hug and peck her but unfortunate for them both, situation did the apart. This said Lady entered into another relationship with another man called Stephen and whenever returns home with gift for the damsel, he will just present the gift without a hug or peck and as a result of this, the lady started nagging and concluded that Stephen was not caring.
Any time Stephen returns home with gift, the lady will receive it but not with an absolute Joy because Stephen was void of Kunle’s gift presentation features.
Dear, for how long will you hurt yourself via this thought of your past? It will only cage your mind and continuously drag you insane. Note that if you do not let go of this thought, you might be physically free of the tie you have with the person but emotionally caged and this will negatively impact your relationship with people.
Finally, note that constant break-up and tie-up in relationship will only lead to a repetition of class in academic term. When you breakup with someone, you have to discard many of the lessons (if not all) you’ve learnt in the course of knowing the person (identity) and pick up (start over again) afresh the learning of the new person and this can end up making you a dullard because of too many irrelevant lessons in your brain. Think twice before you quit.
Read more on Bone or Flesh II